Sunday, January 22, 2012

ADAPT or DIE.




My title post: Adapt or Die is a little dramatic I must admit but like the traditional wedding vows read, "for better or for worse". I believe life masters the flaws we allow or the wondering....I hate wondering. Take that leap of faith or never live to know. 


My brother once told me, " He was proud of me for taking a stand and making a decision with my heart". He doesn't know this but I will always remember the impact I felt when he expressed his support. He doesn't realize how much hope he instilled that day for me to move on. Despite his overbearing big brother ways from our childhood I couldn't have asked for a older, wiser sibling. I've come again to another obstacle in my life where I have to decide what is best for my future. Decisions! Decisions! Decisions! Ugh. I wish I could say, I'm the type of person who makes choices in a minute but sadly I'm not. I'm also known for deciding with my mind rather than my heart. A few of my friends are Heart Deciders and I wish I could have that mentality. I mean when it comes to matters of the heart, it's not easy.

Welllllllll, the time came because I wasn't happy either. I am halfway through receiving my degree and wanted to see what opportunities are available in the working world related to my major: Humanities. Deciding was the biggest challenge!! Weighing the pros and cons, fear of the unknown and the ideas of attachment to what was, and will be plagued my mind. By deciding, I made the choice to leave Discover Card. I am grateful to Discover for giving me the chance to work for them the past three years. I leave ready for a new chapter to unfold.

the Big-Guy and me
Its not a secret my parents have a huge influence over me, so I dreaded breaking the news to them. They  value hard work and I've come to respect hard work through their example. I was afraid of them thinking I'm a quitter because I didn't want them to feel disappointed or judge me. Especially my mother, she believes the longer you work for a company the better. Of course I have a plan B which helped when I told them. Surprisingly, my father took it well but my Mom needed an extra push. Mothers can be quite controlling when they want..Lol. My choices affect those I love and surround myself with so its a big deal I receive support from those who mean the most.
Mama Dearest.

My point is adapting to change much less this adult lifestyle has taken some time. I imagine the ride is going to be full of ups and downs but when I follow my heart I find myself not having regrets. Even if it doesn't satisfy my parents. I needed to take a risk to determine what awaits for me. For now, I'm wingin' it, continuing school full-time and finding a career I love to work with. My parents came to America from Samoa hoping for better opportunities. They work to survive. They've struggled  and held on to provide for my siblings and me. I am eternally  grateful for them. Like Tupac lyrically stated, " Theres no way I can pay you back but the plan is to show you that I understand". I guess a part of learning to grow up is finding my own path.


2 comments:

  1. I'm proud of you sis! I know it must've been hard to take this chance, but I know it will pay off for you and that you'll have a lot of doors opening for you!

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  2. :) Thanks Kayleen!! I'll keep you posted sis. Tryna keep up with the best! Love you!

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